I’m gonna start calling boys by the wrong name on purpose to remind them how unimportant they are
I didn’t appreciate you? Really? No obviously you didn’t. I didn’t talk to you day and night telling you how much I love you to not appreciate you. i didn’t welcome you in my home, greet you with love and tight hugs to not appreciate you. I didn’t study every single detail about you to not appreciate you. I didn’t rub your biceps every morning, for your pleasure, to not appreciate you. I didn’t kiss your shoulders, your muscles, your cheeks and your lips to not appreciate you. I did it to show my admiration for you and to show my love. I didn’t tell you thank you all day and night and remind you constantly that you mean everything to me every time we were together to not appreciate you. You think I bought you food and payed for all kinds of other shit to not appreciate you? No, I did it because I knew if you had it, you’d do the same for me. And I appreciated that. I didn’t give you pep talks and make sure your head was held high when you were down to not appreciate you. I didn’t stay after school for 4 hours in the scorching sun ALONE support you during your practice, go home with, massage you and let you know how great you were to not appreciate you. I didn’t take off all my weekends and early releases to hang out with you to not appreciate you. I didn’t change my hair up, buy all those “sexy” undergarments you loved so much, and wear as much black as possible to not appreciate you. When we got into that argument, I was already crying. So of course at that moment, i’m all emotional. We didn’t even argue, I raised my voice a little and you walk out my house. Oh, but when I try and walk out your house, you chase me down and pull me back, and what did I do? I fucking stayed. Because youwanted me to. Every time you would cry on my shoulders, i’d wipe your tears away. You’d beg me not to leave while balling tears and I told you I wasn’t going nowhere. But when I do it for the first time, you push me through the dirt and laugh in my face. Wtf? And then, you go and love another girl a week after?! You left because of the fucking arguments. Really? I could see if it was because I cheated on you, fucked one of your friends, or disrespected you in any shape or form. But no, cause of the fucking arguments that we would have worked out that same exact day. I didn’t give my brother gas money ALL THE TIME, to pick you up or to take me to your house when you wanted me to come not to appreciate you. Damn. You’re just too damn stubborn to accept the fact that I did appreciate you and love you like you were my own child. The shit you did to me i’d never wish upon my worst enemy. You foul. Yeah I said some things…but I apologized. You’re acting so innocent, like you didn’t call me a bitch 100 times, like you never yelled in my face, or talked shit and tell our business to your little friends. I always told you how handsome you were, how smart you were, how lucky I was to have you, all that. I always loved you and appreciated you. But you break my heart without warning and go love another girl a week later. While you were out loving another girl, I’m here waiting on one call, on one text, something, anything! Now you love somebody else? Relationships aren’t perfect and for you to say I never treated you right is complete downright bullshit. While you’re out kissing on another girl, I’m in bed all day crying. I didn’t eat for 5 days straight. 5 days straight, not a bit of food. None. Because I’ve been so depressed about my true love leaving me. And you’re out loving another girl like you didn’t just break my heart. I got crazy yeah, that was only because I was hurt and confused. I didn’t know what to do, I had no one to talk to. Like seriously. And I never tormented your family at that. You can blame me all you want but I am not the one to blame at all. I gave 100% on our relationship, but when something small happens, you walk out of my life like I never gave you my heart and soul. I didn’t let you have sex with me not to appreciate you. I did it because I THOUGHT you’d stick around and wouldn’t hurt me. You know how much I hate my body, I hate it more than anything. You think it was easy taking a shower with you? You think I did it just to do it? No, I did it because I knew for a fact that you loved every single part of me and wouldn’t judge me. I did it because I saw myself marrying you in the future, not because I knew that you’d up and leave me a month or two later. You didn’t appreciate me. We had some downfalls, but our up-rises were amazing. That was me at my absolute worst, when all I tried to do was give you my absolute best. You broke me into pieces. I’m shattered…who REALLY didn’t appreciate who?